Isn’t it irritatingly ironic that having mulled over the obvious amazingness of Cambridge prior to A level R.D., emotions largely appertaining to diffident excitement, have been superseded by dull apprehension? Perhaps it’s the post-results lull, whereby reality is emphatically reinstated subsequent to a protracted period of anxious anticipation; an anti-climax, ‘as it was/were’. Not that I’m dreading University (with a capital ‘U’ – emphasis for obvious reasons), but you can’t flippantly silence ubiquitously perennial reservations, especially considering University signals a colossal watershed in life! I’m sure Fresher’s Week, involving some friend-making, will offer the welcome palliative for this ‘thorn in my side’. Apart from this one fear, fears relating to worthiness, ability, intelligence, adequate preparation (or lack thereof) and dedication, amongst innumerable others, consume every waking hour, determined in their endeavours to assail my Cambridgey elation! Reiterating my ‘worrier’ status would be apt here, what with continually voicing concerns to my small, yet significant (in their own special way), reading demographic.
This may sound incredibly silly, but I’ve grown fond of listening to choral music in the dark. It just seems to powerfully percolate the room with this ethereal ambience, perchance because the mind is acutely divested of extraneous distractions, or because we often connote darkness with sleep; a psychological sedative? Both factors are naturally interrelated. Whitacre’s ‘Sleep’, ‘When David Heard’, coupled with a hearing of Purcell’s ‘Hear my Prayer, O Lord’, ‘When I am laid in Earth’ (‘Dido and Aeneas’), should never go amiss; a truly epitomic juxtaposition of heavenly choral/operatic music. Tallis’ ‘O Nata Lux’ is equally endearing, however, and deserves equal mention with Byrd’s ‘Mass for Four Voices’, which is superlatively sublime, evoking only the most wondrous feelings of spiritual affinity. My IPod, though not deluged with music, is abounding with the genres of music explicitly alluded to, including some recent recordings of Elin Manahan-Thomas, the Welsh soprano. I’m not a fan of classical crossover (ugh) usually, but Elin’s industrious choral leanings have attributed the Clare College graduate with an enviably crystalline tone…
In non-abstract dealings, los padres should be transferring extortionate funds (£1252) to Emmanuel either tomorrow, or Wednesday, which slightly alleviates another modicum of pre-University stress. I’m sincerely looking forward to starting my course, and really indulging some unexplored academic proclivities, although I’m not terribly aware of what these are. It’s more a case of intrepidly discovering intrinsically interesting knowledge in a subject I’ve never studied before. A risk? Yes. A worthwhile risk? Definitely. I sometimes reflect on how amazing Eng Lit is, but then remind myself of poetry’s puerility (flagrant generalisation alert). Religion fascinates me, but then Anthropology might contextualise religion’s importance to humanity in a perhaps more relevantly secular ‘paradigm’ of thought. Either way, I get to study everything that interests me, including human and non-human biology, all within one course. Spoiled for choice? YUP!
